[Half/Time 02] Twice Upon a Time Read online

  “No need to go back,” Jack said, his soaking clothes dripping on the floor. “We’re all here, aren’t we, Captain?”

  Bluebeard stared down at the glowing sword at his neck. “I didn’t realize we had the pleasure of one of the Wicked Queen’s Eyes on board me ship,” he said, giving Jack a steady stare.

  “You still don’t,” Jack said. “We’re leaving. We have to get halfway across the ocean to find the Sea Witch. May, Phillip, there are probably about a dozen pirates trying to get through the door I just locked behind me. I’m gonna suggest we find another way out. Like maybe the window.”

  “Even those who’ve sampled the mermaids’ tears might wish to take a moment before jumpin’ into merman-infested waters,” Bluebeard suggested, his eyes still on Jack.

  “Merman-infested waters?” Jack said. “Where are we?”

  “Directly over the capital city of the mermen,” Bluebeard mentioned. “There be safer places to go for a pleasure swim.”

  “Wait,” May said. “You knew we could breathe underwater?”

  “Ye think we didn’t see you all at the shore, makin’ fools o’ yerselves in the water?” Bluebeard laughed. “Just because I wasn’t in me right head, under that fool Pan’s control, doesn’t mean I wasn’t payin’ attention!”

  “You seem a lot less enraged now too,” May pointed out suspiciously. “You were just faking all that crazy?”

  “Fakin’? No,” the captain said, giving her a careful stare. “But don’t be misunderestimatin’ Captain Bluebeard anytime soon, lassie. I don’t be who ye think I be!”

  “You be someone without a good grasp on yer grammar, is who I think ye be,” May pointed out.

  “Am I?” Captain Bluebeard asked softly, his pirate accent dropping away completely. “Whatever would make you believe such a thing, my lady?”

  Phillip stepped between them. “Enough. We know where the Sea Witch is now. What would you have us do, Captain?”

  “Have us do?” Jack said. “We’re getting the Sea Witch and leaving. End of story.”

  “Put away that cursed sword of yers before I feed it to you, Little Eye,” Bluebeard said with a wide smile. “These two made a deal with me.”

  “Oh, please don’t tell me,” Jack said, shaking his head. “You want her too?”

  “How did you know?” May asked, raising an eyebrow. “He said he’d get us to the Sea Witch if we bring her back here. Though there are still quite a few parts of this deal that are pretty unclear. Like, how do we find her, and why are we bringing her back?”

  “All good questions,” Bluebeard said. “And all have easy answers! The Sea Witch is known to have a lair outside the city. And as fer why do I want her?” Bluebeard said, pushing Jack’s sword away from him. “’Tis a job she can help me with, nothing more. But a job that will see me rich beyond me wildest dreams.”

  “Some would think all this might make the Sea King angry,” Jack said, just as quietly.

  “That’s my issue, Little Eye,” Bluebeard said, his voice lowering dangerously. “I can handle His Majesty just fine.”

  Jack paused again, then nodded. “In that case, I’m on board,” Jack said, then glanced down at the ship. “You know, both literally and… oh, forget it. We’ll find the Sea Witch, bring her here so she can help you, then have her take us back to the Homelands. Sounds like a plan.” Again, he hoped Bluebeard wouldn’t see through him. All they had to do was find the Sea Witch, then run, avoiding the whole pirate-merman fiasco just waiting to happen.

  Bluebeard grinned widely. “And just in case ye be plannin’ on breaking yer deal with me—say, just findin’ the Sea Witch, then runnin’—my nets will be waitin’ fer you.” He pushed his face up to Jack’s, forty years of bad breath blowing in Jack’s face. “And me pirates… they get hungry when they fish.”

  Jack blinked a few times at the man’s breath while May made a disgusted face right next to him. “Thankfully, we’d never even consider breaking our deal,” Jack told him.

  “Perfect!” Bluebeard yelled. “We’ll wait till the sun giant puts his fireball out, and then get you three in the water and findin’ the Sea Witch! But before ye go, ye three might want to be doin’ somethin’ about those legs o’ yers.” He stopped, then brightened. “Maybe Pan will come in handy after all!”

  “Oh, that doesn’t sound good in any way,” May said.

  “Things never do,” Jack said.

  CHAPTER 15

  They had a few hours before nightfall, and after the events of the last day, sleep seemed like a good plan, if an unlikely one. May, as she had for the last three months, tossed and turned, which kept Jack awake worrying about her.

  At least, awake long enough for sleep to arrive, smack him around a little, then knock him out completely.

  “Well, look who’s making some progress,” said a girl in a dark blue cloak as Jack woke up beneath a familiar-looking oak tree. Lian sat in the branches, absently balancing the pointy tip of her sword on one finger, barely paying any attention to it.

  Jack glanced up at her, then shook his head. “I wish we were. If only we could figure out how to get out of the Land of Never. You know what? Have the Wolf King bring his army in. I think we’re ready to give up.”

  “You’re playing a dangerous game, going after the Sea Witch,” Lian told him, either seeing through his bluff or completely ignoring it. “And for what, the help of a pirate? I’ve heard nothing but good things about Bluebeard, after all. All those wives, dead. But I’m sure you know what you’re doing.”

  “Listen,” Jack said. “I appreciate your advice, mostly because I know you have our best interests at heart. And I can’t say this hasn’t been fun, because I get confused with double negatives, but I really have somewhere else—really, anywhere else—to be right now, so I’ll be seeing you.” He turned and walked away.

  Only to find that a minute later, he did see her, as the oak tree reappeared right in front of him. He sighed, wondering if that could get any more annoying.

  “Taking on the Sea King?” Lian asked him, still in the branches. “In his element, beneath the waves? Even my Queen fears him there. You’re stupider than I gave you credit for.”

  “I’m stupider than a LOT of people give me credit for!” Jack shouted back. “Now stop trying to find out my plans!”

  Lian laughed, then hopped down weightlessly from the tree. “Where do you think we are, Jack? You really think you can hide things from me in here?”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “It means we’re in your dreams, you idiot,” she said, shaking her head in disgust. “And where do you think your dreams live? Think about it, even if it hurts. If I’m in your head, I have access to everything else in here, what little there might be. See that city over there?” She pointed at the city in the distance. “It’s obviously not really a city, but there’s a reason you’ve got such big walls around it. That represents all your secrets. All your dreams.” She smiled mockingly. “All your feelings for a certain princess—”

  “GET OUT of my head!” Jack shouted at her, then drew his sword and leapt straight at her.

  Lian didn’t even bother moving. Instead she just grabbed his sword out of midair and held it in place, despite Jack struggling with all his strength against her. “I’ve already been through the city, Jack,” she said. “It’s been a learning experience. You really don’t think much of dear old dad, do you?”

  Jack just growled in frustration and kicked out, but Lian caught his leg with her own foot, and knocked it away. “That’s not all I saw in there, Jack,” she said, still smiling. “There are memories you have that you probably don’t even know about, memories locked away so deep that you probably never even knew they were missing.”

  “I like that you think I believe anything you say,” Jack said quietly, still pushing as hard as he could on the sword she held in place.

  Lian laughed, then abruptly dropped his sword, sending Jack tumbling forward. She elbowed him as he
fell past, knocking him to the dirt, then sat down on his back as soon as he’d landed, pinning him to the ground. “I’m sure you don’t. And you’re right, what missing memories could I possibly be talking about? I’m sure you remember that injury you had when you were younger, why your parents sent you to live with your grandfather, what happened to your father. You do remember all those things, right?”

  Jack tried to roll away or push himself up, but somehow the girl seemed to have gained about a thousand pounds, and he couldn’t push her off. “I’ve lived with my grandfather all my life,” he spat. “And I was never hurt as a child. Nice try, though.”

  Lian sighed. “I’m just trying to help you here, Jack. Don’t you get it? You’re on the wrong side. Your good guys? The Charmed One? Who do you think messed with your memories in the first place? And why would he do that, Jack? Why would an Eye want to make sure you don’t remember certain things about who you are, where you’re from? When did he do it? Did he know you, back when he was still alive? Why would he not want you to remember your father? Your mother?”

  “GET OFF ME!” Jack shouted, and doubled his efforts, but nothing would even sway the girl.

  “This dreamland, it’s not real,” Lian told him. “You basically can do whatever you want in here, which makes it perfect for training to be an Eye. That’s why the Charmed One met you here… only, you wouldn’t listen to him. Which was smart, I’ll give you that. Doubt whatever anyone says until you find the truth out for yourself. It’s one of the first precepts of being an Eye.”

  Abruptly the weight on Jack’s back lifted, and he rolled over to find Lian in the tree’s branches once more. Jack pushed himself to his feet, glaring at the girl. “If he can train me to beat you, I’m all for it. Bring him back.”

  “Oh, he can’t return while I’m around, I’ve made sure of that,” Lian said with a shrug. “You don’t need him lying to you while I’m trying to spread a little truth.”

  “Didn’t you just say I shouldn’t believe what anyone tells me?” Jack hissed.

  “See, you’re learning already!” Lian said, applauding him. “You’ll find out eventually. You’ll see who’s telling the truth and who’s lying to you. And then tell me you’re on the right side of all this.”

  She smiled widely just as everything began wavering. He was waking up.

  “Good luck with lying to the pirates, Jack!” Lian shouted, waving good-bye. “They’re known for chopping off the heads of anyone who betrays them, so that might be a problem!”

  And just like that, Lian and the tree were gone, and Jack opened his eyes to see the princess leaning over him.

  “Yeah, I couldn’t sleep either,” May said, still tapping his shoulder.

  “Um, right,” Jack said. “What’s wrong. Nightmares?”

  “In a way,” She said, her face unreadable. “Jack, I think I should turn myself in. You know, to the Wicked… to my grandmother.”

  CHAPTER 16

  They left Phillip to sleep, then walked up some rickety stairs to the main deck. Since they weren’t moving, or sailing, or whatever the word was, the pirates didn’t have much to do, so they just clustered in small groups, staying quiet so as to not attract any unwanted merman attention. Most just chatted quietly, but one group clustered around Skinny, playing a disturbing game using his finger bones instead of actual dice.

  Stopping at the ship’s railing, far enough away from the pirates for some privacy, May and Jack watched the sun slowly tumble into the ocean, the heat already sizzling the water.

  “I’ll never get used to that,” May said, her eyes reflecting the orange and purple sky.

  “Then we’re all thankful the sun giant does his job despite your discomfort,” Jack said as the ship gently bobbed up and down.

  “Tomorrow night, Jack,” May said. “We’ve already wasted one day, and the dragons will be there tomorrow night. And then it’s all over.”

  “You think that was wasted?” Jack said, raising an eyebrow. “Did you not see how badly I destroyed Pan in that contest of wits?”

  “You’re amazing,” May said, glaring at him. “Can’t you ever be serious?”

  Jack paused, then sighed. “You’re sort of serious enough for all three of us, May. I… I guess I’ve just been trying to take your mind off things.”

  “Nice try, but the world won’t let that happen,” May said. “But if I gave myself up… if I turned myself in, maybe my grandmother… maybe she’d—”

  “Stop calling her that,” Jack said, pushing away from the railing to look straight at her. “Don’t call her that anymore, okay? Because there is NOTHING of her in you, do you hear me? NOTHING.”

  “You don’t know that,” May said, looking back out at the ocean. “I’m so… so angry, all the time. Angry at her, angry at me, at us for letting her back out into the world. I just… I don’t know how to make things better.”

  “You’re doing that right now,” Jack told her. “You’re making things better by saving the Fairy Homelands. By finding out who you are. By doing exactly what she doesn’t want you to do. Don’t you get it? The fact that she’s trying so hard to keep us from finding that out, that must mean something! There must be a reason!”

  “Yeah, I’m sure I’ll find out and live happily ever after.”

  “Happily ever what?”

  “It means that I’ll be happy forever, ’cause that’s how fairy—uh, kids stories end,” May said, the wind blowing her hair. “Except they don’t, do they? Obviously not.”

  “Uh, no,” Jack said, giving her a confused look. “How could anyone possibly be happy forever? You really think you’re never going to stub your toe, or get sick, or fight with your friend? No one lives happily never after.”

  “Ever after.”

  “Whatever. I’ve never heard of anything so stupid. Talk about a kid’s story.”

  “So what’s the point, then, if we can’t be happy? Why are we doing any of this?”

  “Oh, there’s definitely happiness,” Jack said, turning his back on the ocean and looking at her. “But it’s just about moments, not ever-afters.” He grinned. “Like when you’re right in the middle of the worst adventure imaginable, but for a minute, it’s just about sitting on a boat in the middle of the ocean with your friends, with no one trying to kill you in any kind of horrifying way. You have to appreciate these moments when they happen, ’cause obviously we don’t get many of them.”

  May glanced at him, and started to smile in return, for the first time in a while.

  So of course someone had to come along to ruin it all. “That is a beautiful sunset!” Phillip said.

  “Drink it in, Your Highness,” Jack said, glaring at the prince. “It might be the last one you ever see.”

  “Oh, I have faith that we can handle the mermen,” Phillip said, smiling at him.

  “Sure. Let’s pretend that’s what I meant.”

  “We were just talking about why we’re doing this,” May told the prince.

  “That is easy,” Phillip said, stepping between them with a wide smile. “We do this because it is right! I can see how you might think this responsibility, this adventure we are on, that it is too big for us, or that we would be better off just giving the Queen what she wants, that it would save lives. But neither of those things are true.”

  “You heard that?” May asked, but Phillip held up a hand.

  “Considering that we do not know who or where you come from, we cannot say that handing you over to the Wicked Queen would not make things worse, correct?” Phillip said. “Not to mention, the Queen had more than sufficient reason to wipe out the Fairy Homelands because of their power and their alliance with the humans. Coincidence or no, we are not the only reason she is doing this.”

  “But what if she’d stop?” May said. “What if by giving myself up, she—”

  “Or what if we put a stop to her plans and keep you free?” Phillip said, the wind blowing his hair as well. “What if we three embrace the road destiny has
laid before us, and accomplish what we have set out to do, stealing victory from those who would do us harm, and finally learning the truth of your history, Princess?”

  “I’m hearing a lot of what-ifs in there,” Jack said.

  “Of course, for we have not yet finished this quest,” Phillip said. “But we shall, and when we do, and stand triumphant beside Merriweather and her sisters as they fight back against the Queen’s armies, you shall realize I am right. For we three will be heroes! And nothing can stop the noble of heart, no matter how evil might try!”

  “It must be pretty nice in your world, huh, Phillip?” Jack asked. “All flowers and rainbows?”

  “No matter our past,” Phillip said, ignoring Jack, “no matter what mistakes we have made, we can do nothing more than try to live well in the present and strive to make the future a better place. And we are doing that very thing now. We had the noblest of intentions when rescuing your grandmother, Princess, and still do now, but the difference is, we know who our enemies are, and that they want us stopped. That should be reason enough for confidence, even joyful enthusiasm, for our task at hand!”

  “You’re right, Phillip!” May said, slamming a hand down on the railing. “Let’s go jump in the ocean and try not to drown, just to annoy my grandmother!”

  Phillip laughed, and May hugged him, shaking her head, while Jack sighed, glancing over his shoulder at the pirates behind them… and then at the sword on his own back.

  Did they really know who their enemies were?

  CHAPTER 17

  It sure looks wet,” May said, scrunching up her nose. The three of them sat on the ship’s railing, this time surrounded by pirates, three of which were holding Pan tightly. In front of them a grim, grinning Bluebeard waited impatiently.

  “Aye, wet, and colder than ye can imagine,” Bluebeard said, his voice quieter than normal, more of a dull roar than the usual bellow. “Ye’ll most likely be miserable and chilled to yer very bones. Such is the pirate’s life.”